Anticipating Motherhood

Anticipating Motherhood
I’m the inspired and easily-inspire-able sort. I see art that moves me and ideas for songs and sculpture and poetry envelope my mind. I see strong, inspiring community leaders and a wish to be of service to the world in a mobilizing way wells up in me. I see a happy family, and... you guessed it... I am filled with dreams of motherhood and family and partnership and... babies!

Motherhood. Mmmm... maybe its my age (clock... ticking... ovaries... singing). Maybe its the awesome role models I have around me (*Boba moms* are some of the most inspiring women I’ve met). Maybe its my loving partner (he’s got “great dad” written all over him!). And maybe, just maybe its simply a calling to honor a deep impulse, a right, an honor to embark on the path of motherhood and all it may entail.

I have on more than one occasion been confided in by friends who were so surprised at the level of love they found themselves capable of as a mother - love they didn’t even know existed within them. I’ll never forget the first time a young mother said to me, “I just didn’t know what love was unti I had Jake.” Wow. Now, I bet most of you reading this are already mothers and know full well what they were talking about. For me, it’s a mysterious, hopeful idea.

Through exploring the world of natural and attachment parenting, seeing so much shared about the power of *baby wearing* and *kangaroo care*, and watching the relationships of mothers and babies around me, I’ve come to see motherhood as simply a deep deep relationship with life and of honoring that life in every way we know how.

Now, I’ve also heard lots of down right horrid stories about the trials and tribulations of parenthood, too; of sleepless nights, tormented frustration, worry, fear and rage. And I’ve taken that in, too... well, the idea of what it must be like, because let’s face it... I don’t really know. But I sure am willing to find out!

Over the last few years, my thoughts have run the gamut from feeling like motherhood was my responsibility, if only so because I should experience the greatest love possible in this life and not squander that opportunity, to doubting whether I would have children and contribute to a growing, burdened world population, to feeling I may have something special to give a growing little human and therefore had better... to all points in between.

And so, who really knows what my future holds. But I am open, willing and ready to love as deeply as I can, and to give all I know (and will find out) how. And I offer my thanks and gratitude to all *mothers* for even making this a point of inspiration in my life... and to my own mother for all she must have given and endured so that I could be here now.

~ Heather